| In my 63 years on the planet, I’ve experienced this first hand – and yesterday, on the 32nd year anniversary of motherhood (Happy Birthday Caroline!), I thought I’d share some of the lessons I’ve learned. Maybe they’ll help you in letting go, too. 1. The first is the biggest – letting go ALWAYS creates space for the next thing. Even with the passing of a loved one. When my mom passed, I moved to Colorado and started my life with Mark. Bittersweet? Of course, but this is how life is. 2. There’s an inner shift that’s sort of the predicate to letting go – a redefining, a reexamining of your values, your dreams, your desires, and your belief systems. And there’s pain too – old stuff can bubble to the surface. 3. The fear fence rises – this is the attachment that we have to the old thing, and it’s natural and normal. The fear comes up – but that just lets you know that your worth, value, and even security might be entangled in the attachment itself, but letting go of that doesn’t mean you lose yourself. 4. Allow for the space – this is how we hear from God. We have a tendency to fill the space, get busy, and make a lot of plans to avoid the void. BUT this is a sacred time to heal, renew, and grow. Don’t fear the space – embrace it. 5. There’s a cascade of emotions – new ones, old ones, and surprising ones. The processing of them takes a minute. It’s not a quick little download session – there are a lot of layers. When we’re aware, when we give ourselves full permission, we can process and not wallow. There’s a huge difference! 6. Everything has an ending – including the energy of letting go. I remember how I felt after a really hard breakup (and the accompanying heartache of being cheated on) and all it entailed. It consumed me! I cried; I got angry; I talked my girlfriend’s ear off. I PROCESSED. Until one day, I remember waking up and feeling less consumed by it. (Remember Monday’s show?) This was Acceptance, capital A, and I was relieved to have a little of my mojo back. That was when I knew I was getting on the other side – and even if emotions were to spike again, I reminded myself of who I was – Fierce, Capable, and a Phoenix! – and I would bloody well rise again! 7. My higher self was calling. I could rise like the aforementioned phoenix, OR I could play small and choose to wallow. That was a big moment! I kept telling myself, “I’m better than that. It’s his loss – he’ll regret it!” (And he did by the way – he came groveling and I said Buh-bye! It felt REALLY good!) Very simply, I learned by letting go that I wasn’t being punished; I wasn’t having something taken away, BUT I was being brought to a new place, a new level, and it was there in the midst of all that pain and uncertainty that I was able to heal some old recurring stuff that had brought me to the place – the good, amazing place that I am in today. Fear is amplified by the unknown and the uncertainty. We try so hard to understand it all. We ask “Why?” a lot, and it’s natural. But WHAT IF we instead allowed for all of the stuff to bubble up? To be processed? What if, in the midst of it all, we declared that we were available to go to the next level? What if we created an open heart instead of a closed one? These are all decisions we make in the process of letting go. Is it painful? Yes. But is it necessary? Unfortunately, it is. Your life and my life are magical. Created on purpose and for purpose, and I don’t know about you, but I’m very much available for that! Next level up, please! |
